TDR: (Don’t) use your words
* Off the bench *
* Halftime *
Well, it’s Tuesday so we figured you could use a Rally pup. Joel Embiid and his Sports Illustrated model girlfriend Ana De Paula got one of those puppies that looks like a teddy bear of some sort. Me thinks it is some sort of doodle. Perfect specimen. His name is Klaus Hinkie De Paula Embiid. Klaus is a character on Vampire Diaries and The Originals, they informed us by #hashtagging both the shows in their Instagram, while Hinkie references former 76ers GM Sam Hinkie. Honestly, I’m going to call him by his middle name. Hinkie is an incredibly cute name for a doodle pup, and that’s just facts. Congrats on your perfect dog and life you two!
Old man Ingram
Last year, Andre Ingram came on the scene as the oldest NBA rookie since the sixties. He was picked up by the Lakers from the Developmental League at the age of 32, and ended up playing some great basketball for them. A feel good story, indeed. Well he’s back and the Lakers are bringing him back on board for a little bit. The video of him getting called up is super sweet and touching. My favorite thing about this story is Ingram’s v silvery hair makes this whole thing look so much more dramatic. It looks like he is legit pushing 50 and his NBA dreams are coming true. There should be a Disney movie about the old man with silver hair who beats all mathematical odds to help the Lakers get in the Playoffs. It would end with the reveal that he is actually a ghost and the players had what they needed in their hearts all along to get it done. **Grabs laptop and scurries to Starbucks to start screenplay immediately**
* Keep your eye on the ball *
Nick Foles is heading down south to become the quarterback for the Jacksonville Jaguars. He really pulled off a nice deal for himself, considering the Jags were the only team actually trying to get the former Super Bowl MVP, with his four-year $88 million contract. Cleaned up well, Nick. Now of course people are saying “Um, excuse me,” (please picture this in a very nerdy voice) “will this actually solve the Jags problems. You are going to need more offensive weapons and the defense to *moves glasses up nose* keep performing at an extremely high level.” Yeah no duh, nerds. But this is exciting. We need a quarterback to get excited about, and I’m going to focus on the positives because I’m an optimistic fan who, idk, likes feeling happy?
* Plays under review *
No pictures please
Conor McGregor, more like Conor McGetyourphoneoutofmyface-er. The Irish MMA star was leaving the Fontainebleau in Miami Beach around 5 a.m. on Monday (talk about some delayed Sunday Scaries if you are leaving LIV at that time) when a 22-year-old guy tried to take his picture with his phone. Conor grabbed the phone, threw it on the ground and stomped on it. You know what, SAME, Conor. Get your phone out of my face at 5 a.m.! The problem is that whole “it’s against the law to violently smash someone’s property” thing, so the police arrested him yesterday. He was charged with strong-armed robbery and criminal mischief, which it really does crack me up that those are two real life names of crimes. He was released on bail, so we will see what comes of all this.
Last night, Oklahoma City Thunder star Russell Westbrook got into a heated exchange with some fans in Utah. It came to a head when he told the guy “I’ll f–k you up. You and your wife.” Westbrook said the guy told him to “get on your knees like you used to” which obvi set Westbrook off. He completely stood by his comments, which were way too aggressive IMO, but said something does need to be done to fans who yell terrible things at players. He said he will always stand up for himself and his family, and as for his comments directed toward the guy’s wife, he said he never has laid a hand on a woman and he said that because the wife also yelled the inappropriate comment at him. It’s not a good look, for Russell at all, but he’s not wrong about there needing to be a bit more control over fans saying ridiculous things. Not only does is it disrespectful to the people involved in the game, but most fans also don’t want to hear that stuff.
* Overtime *