TDR: Stand up
* Off the bench *
No, coach, I actually really need to know the time.
* Leading off *
- Let’s get things started on an uplifting note – Chad Bettis made his return to the mound for the Rockies after battling cancer for nine months. The screen showed images of him making public appearances during his battle as he approached the mound during pregame where he pitched seven scoreless innings. He said he was holding back tears – just as we are right now, oh man. No really does someone have some tissues.
- No sense in waiting when you can take care of a team record right away. One game after Giancarlo Stanton hit his record-tying 42nd home run for the Marlins this season, he notched number 43 making it his fifth consecutive game where he’s homered. He is certainly, uh, on a tear.
- The Subway Series is underway in NYC and the Yankees took game one over the Mets. Oh, hey Aaron Judge, that was a nice homer. Judgey Wudgey has struggled a bit since the All-Star Game where he won the home run contest, but it’s allllll about trusting the process, people.
* Halftime *
Things Tim Tebow did this week
We just need to make a recurring segment dedicated solely to Tebow. First of all, it should be noted he took a fastball to the head during a game against the Tampa Yankees, walked it off and then returned to the game. What. That looked so painful how you do that, Timmy? Off the field, we have seen the videos of Tebow making the days of little cutie kids, but what about little cutie grandmas? One v good grandson asked Tebow if he would give his grandma a shoutout while signing autographs. Tebow of course obliged and omg watch the cutie grandma’s reaction seeing the video of Tebow wishing her well as she recovers from a stroke. Jeeze, between Bettis making his debut after battling cancer and this sweet pea it is waterworks central over here.
* Keep your eye on the ball *
Get it on the schedule
The NBA schedule was released yesterday, and the season opener is between the Cavs and Celtics on October 17. The biggest update: teams will never be faced with playing four games in five nights, so enjoy that rest, gentlemen. Ch ch check out a deeper look into the schedule here.
* Play under review *
Push comes to shove
We like Cristiano Ronaldo better when he is blessing us with a look at his rockhard abbies, not when he is pushing refs and acting like a jerk. During Real Madrid’s game against Barcelona, Ronaldo got himself a bad attitude after he received his second yellow card meaning he was out of the game. He pushed the ref, so now he is looking at a five-game ban. And you got off easy, mister. Don’t be rude, and don’t think taking off your shirt makes this right, sir!
* After further review *
You’re toxic(ology report)
Tried my best with that headline. Tiger Woods was arrested for suspicion of driving under the influence in May and plead guilty to reckless driving on Monday. He will enter a diversion program to get his record wiped clean. Also, his toxicology report was released revealing what drugs were in his system. There was a combo of a generic Vicodin, the painkiller Dilaudid, Xanax and ambien. Additionally there was a little THC aka the active ingredient in marijuana. He has already completed a training program seeking help managing his prescription drugs. He most recently was seen diving into the ocean and catching lobsters with his hands, so it appears he is feeling much better.
* Overtime *